The old soul millenial

Traveling alone was part of my bucket list. I'm 16 by then and I promise to myself that I'm going to travel at the very young age. Then voila! Mission accomplished. I traveled outside the country ALL BY MYSELF at the age of 19. I know I'm not the only person who did solo travelling at the young age but I can't contain the joy to myself. So let me just share my solo travelling experience in Thailand. Elephants, temples and street food these are the things that comes to my mind when I heard Thailand. Since it would be my first solo travel, I want to go to some part of South-east Asian country where I can spend less (since I don't have a lot of savings). I'm actually thinking what country will I visit, 'cause I would like to go to either to these three: Cambodia, Thailand and Vietnam.  And since I love Mario Maurer (insert heart emoji here), I decided to go to Thailand.  Actually, I'm planning to travel while I'm still 18 yrs.old. But I realized...

Time check it's 12:01 am... I decided to write here while drying my hair 'cause I dyed my roots and also listening to soothing OPM songs like Buwan, Kathang-isip, Kung wala ka, Di na muli and etc. More importantly I am writing now 'cause I have a lot of words inside my mind and I need to let it out. I'm kinda teary right now and I want to cry. Just to let you know, it's my 3rd day of mens so I think it has an impact I guess? I know it's not a PMS but girls are emotional when they have. As you all know, I'm writing most of the time because I'm sad and blue and a lot of words we're playing in my mind.  "Halo-halo eh, andami kong naiisip tungkol sa future ko, whether it's good or bad."  Na aansha ako sa mga naiisip ko.  I'm thinking about my mom. All the time. Hindi lang siguro halata, hindi naman kasi ako showy kung gaano ko kamahal yung tao o kaimportante sya sa akin. Pero sya lagi kong iniisip at pinapanalagin. Na sana....

If you were given a chance to invent something what would it be? A time machine-- I said.  But no, I can't invent a time machine and no one can. If I ever had an illness like Drew Barrymore has on 50 first date, I'll pick one memory and that was I'm with you whether its good or bad. If there's one people I wanna live together for a lifetime  it's you and always you.   " and I have hope toward God, which hope these [men] themselves also entertain, that there is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous. " (Acts 24:15) I k now and truly believe what Bible has promised. But would you blame me If I really miss you so much? If I really want to see you as soon as possible?  My cousins and I had a conversation about some stuff. My cousin Abby shared her feelings on what her dad told about the teasing between her (abby) and the guy (who has a feelings for her). Her dad told her aunt not to tease them 'cause...

How's life? It's been a month since we had our last conversation on IG. You know what, I'm currently listening to the songs that makes me remember you. Songs like: Take me home by Us the Duo how would you feel by Ed Sheeran Castle on the hill by Ed Sheeran Kung wala ka by Hale, one of my favorite opm songs and I believe favorite mo din kasi lagi kong napapansin na lagi mong mina-my day sa IG. Mundo by IV of spades kasi kamukha mo si Unique at parehong lab ko kayo ni Unique. Currently listening to these para feel na feel ko yung pagsulat ko sayo. I really want to talk to you  through IG kasi dun lang naman pwede, dahil hindi naman kita fino-follow na sa ibang social media and even though I have your number syempre hindi naman ako ganun pa ka-desperate to text you. Ayokong ako yung mag first move (pero parang ako naman talaga nag first move like following you first on IG then you followed me back na lang haha). So yun na nga I wanna talk to you, but I don't kn...

Dear 20 year old self, This would be the last teenage drama note you'll ever receive from my 19 year old self. In just a few days, another year will come though Age doesn't really matter and age is just a number. And yep, I don't celebrate my birthday too so turning into 20 doesn't really matter to me.  Well, my 19 year old self is writing this because for her, she experienced a lot of things so far. I think this phase of her life is the beginning of what they called "adulting" and for her it was really uneasy.  My 19 year old point-of-view: These past few days, 4 days to be exact, I feel so worthless. All I did was to sleep longer than normal. It's like I don't wanna wake up and I dont want to face the world. I feel guilty at the same time 'cause I'll just woke up to eat and the fact is I'm just staying at my aunt's house. I don't go to school for 2 weeks now and I resigned at work. I wanna withdraw myself to everyon...

This would be my first entry here on which I called " Teenage Damn Feelings". This is the collection of thoughts and feelings of a typical teenager like me, which I usually do not tell to anyone orally cause I know they don't feel what I feel, or I think they'll  just judge me without knowing my whole story. 01-02-2017 6:00 pm. I spent most of my time just lying on the bed after eating a burger and just sipped a milkshake. This is the reason why I gained weight when I'm depressed, I ate alot cause there's pleasurable feeling when you're eating. It's like " I'm having companion atleast, thank you so much food!" The feeling that "buti pa ang pagkain laging andyan para sayo ".. I hate the feeling when you say to someone that you're sad, or depressed. Cause I'll see it in their eyes, and it's like " wala akong pake sa nararamdaman mo, basta ako masaya ako ngayon.. " So what I did is just to keep it by mys...

October 21 2016 Saturday It’s a fine and an ordinary Saturday. I have a scheduled gala with my previous college blockmate.It happened that I didn’t go to work last night , so I’m in the condition of meeting up with a long time-no-see friend. Well I’m so excited to travel quite far, cause I remember my Spotify was turned into premium now. I just downloaded the songs on demand right now, and I just loved that feeling, doing soundtrip while travelling.    My friend and I just went to Trinoma and SM north. It happened that the two of us were trying to find the POPCULTURE store in Trinoma, we’ll just buy some stuff and the rest would be window shopping. After we bought some stuffs in Trinoma we moved to SM North. I’m so thirsty and hungry by that time, and I badly needed a Milktea. Yes, a Milktea. There’s something pleasurable to Milkteas that’s why I love them. We also tried Bibimbob, cause I don’t want to eat fried and unhealthy food. I’m trying to be on Health living side....

June 21, 2015 Sunday    . It was afternoon and it's raining, and i'm all alone. The rain wasn't that heavy, but i hate it when it rains. I don't know. But raining makes me feel sad. And i realized that the weather really affects my mood. I usually get sad and frightened when raining, and many of my friends knew that. The aura in this house was very lousy. I'm here at my Aunt's home at Paranaque since last night, slept by myself cause my cousin was working at night and my tita had a camping or let say bonding with her workmates out of the city. Yesterday morning, i was still upset since last day because of the conflicts about my schedule in school. I really need to tagged my subjects, but the line was long, super long... And i get confused on the process of tagging, and all i knew is that, that day was the last day of tagging and paying of tuition fees cause that was also the last day of adjustment period. So i decided to pay instead of tagging my one subj...

Dati kalaro ko lang sila, ngayon ang lalaki na! Cute nang mga baby girls ko! Meet Ching and Chai. :) Hihi. Nilalaro nila si lola.. Mga pacute na bata! :)

We prepared a small celebration for our Tito & Tita's 19th anniversary. (There's a FOREVER) R)

February 14, 2014. Friday. Nai-post na ang results sa MOCK Test. May halong pananabik at saya ang nararamdaman ko. Nagbabaka-sakaling makita ko ang pangalan ko sa Top 100 na highest sa English, Physics, Math, Social Studies at Filipino Nung tiningnan ko na ang results bigla akong nakaramdam ng lungkot, habang hinahanap ko ang pangalan ko. Halos inisa-isa ko na yung pangalan, pero wala talagang nakasulat na Gutierrez, Keren G. Bigla kong natandaan na huli na nga pala kami nakapag exam nun dahil, hindi ako mismo nakapasok nung araw na magma-MOCK exam. Pinuntahan ko ang nakasabay ko mag-exam, ang sabi niya hindi na raw na ipasa ang papel namin kaya wala talaga ang pangalan namin sa paskil. Nanghihinayang ak na ewan. Sana pala hindi na lang nila kami binigyan pa nang oras para mag-exam lalo pa't babalewalain lang. Na-kwento ko naman sa mga classmates ko na hindi ak nakapag exam sa mismong araw ng MOCK exam at tinanong nila kung ano daw ang dahilan kung bakit di ako pumasok. Sabi ko naw...

Isa,Dalawa,Tatlo Keren G. Gutierrez Ilang minuto na lamang at sasapit na ang alas dose ng gabi. Mistulang mga paslit na iiwan ng kanilang magulang ang mga mamayan ng San Jose. Lahat sila ay takot na takot. Maaga pa lamang ay nagsara na sila ng kani-kanilang pintuan at bintana. Tila ba’y parang may masamang loob ang susunggab sa kanilang maliliit na tirahan kapag sasapit na ang alas dose ng gabi. Lahat ng pamilya ay halos takot na takot maliban na lamang sa dalawang mag-asawa na sina Josefina at Gregor. Nakasarado ang kanilang pinto, ngunit nanatiling nakabukas ang kanilang mga bintana. Marahil nais ni Gregor na madama ang malamig na simoy na hangin na nanggagaling sa dalampasigan. Napansin din ng mga kalapit bahay nila na nanatiling bukas ang lampara na nagmumula sa tahanan ng mag-asawa. Wari ang mga ito ay walang nararamdamang pangangamba, kahit na sumapit ang alas-dose ng hatinggabi. “ Tong-tong-tong ” ilang sandali at tumunog na ang dambana. Hudyat lamang na sumapit na...

Alam ko naman at naniniwala ako na may dahilan at plano ang Diyos para sakin. Pero masakit din para sakin ang mga pagbabagong yun. Siguro nga hindi na ko gaya ng dati at mas sikat na sa ibang aspeto, pero ano kayang plano nya, at bakit hindi na ko gaya ng dati.  Ang galing niya, pero dati naman natatalo ko siya. Nasan na kaya napunta ang mga kaalaman na meron ako dati? Hindi naman ako na-untog o nabagok pero bigla na lamang ito nawala.  Ang masakit pa sa araw ng pagtatapos, makaka-akyat siya. Samantalang ako, mananatiling naka-upo. Nakatingin sa kanila, pati sa kanyang ina, na siguradong masayang masaya at buong tuwang maipagmamalaki ang anak niya. Sabi ng kaibigan ko, pwede naman daw hindi na pumunta don. Kaya lang nag-lalaro s aisipan ko, na isa iyon sa mga okasyon na dapat ay di ko makaligataan, sa aking buhay. Ngunit ayokong masaktan. Pero kailanganh ko na siguro tanggapin sa sarili ko ang katotohanan.